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Grit vs Talent: What’s The Difference And Why Does It Matter?

gjc on December 20, 2024

At times, exceptional performances at the workplace leave some wondering whether it’s a matter of talent or grit. The article series on Grit will unravel how high achievers succeed and why they stay successful, with part one helping you understand what true passion and perseverance can do for you.

Many will recognize talent from a mile away. When we see someone perform a task almost effortlessly, we often conclude that they’re extremely talented. But what most of us fail to see is the arduous hours spent in toiling, preparation, and practice that’s invested behind the scenes.

Academic Psychologist Angela Duckworth, who wrote Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, has done extensive research on thousands of individuals ranging from military cadets to salespeople to students at a public school and spellers at a Spelling Bee contest. 

Duckworth’s research has pulled back the curtains and unravelled what made high achievers so successful and also staying successful. After fine-tuning the results of her research, she concluded that a combination of passion and perseverance is what makes these people stand out from the rest; in other words, they have grit.

What is Grit?

Grit, in simpler terms, means perseverance and effort—to demonstrate an unusual ability that combines exceptional zeal and a capacity for hard work that strives beyond excellence. It’s a ‘never-give-up’ attitude.

More often than not, our passion for certain interests dwindles mainly due to a lack of commitment and perseverance. If we are looking for a certain outcome or success yet only put in meagre effort, chances are, we might also miss out on the improvement that slowly trickles in. And what’s worse, is that our impatience causes us to walk away just as quickly as we started.

Why does grit matter in what we do?

When we start something, the end goal is always to get the job done. But as for high achievers, they don’t just want good; they want to produce the best work. What separates excellent work from mediocre ones is this: High achievers tend to think they are not good enough; they are satisfied being unsatisfied—a huge contrast to being complacent.

However, some would argue, the ones who are naturally talented are just as capable of producing equally excellent results. So, what are the factors that set the gritty and the talented apart?

William James, a Harvard psychologist, declared “human individual lives usually far within his limits; he possesses powers of various sorts which he habitually fails to use. He energizes below his maximum, and he behaves below his optimum.”

What James was trying to say, is that we humans are only making use of only a small part of our possible mental and physical resources. Hence, merely having talent without investing an ounce of effort, discipline, and perseverance will only remain stagnant—it will never reach its fullest potential. It’s almost as if there’s a gap between potential and actualization.

Therefore, talent alone is no guarantee of success.

Journalist and author, Malcolm Gladwell suggested that talent promotes narcissism in some—a behaviour that encourages short-term performance but discourages long-term learning and growth. We risk leaving everything else that matters in the shadows by placing talent on a pedestal. By doing so, we inevitably send a message to the other factors—including grit—are less significant that it ought to be. 

Nietzsche, a German philosopher, once wrote “Our vanity, our self-love, promotes the cult of genius. For if we think of genius as something magical, we are not obliged to compare and find ourselves lacking…To call someone ‘divine‘ means: ‘here there is no need to compete.’” 

Grit behaves the opposite, it challenges why must we emphasize plenty on talent and fixate such extreme limits on what we might do, rather than the actual effort put in that will decide where we would end up in the long run.

The ‘natural bias‘ is this: There’s a prejudice hidden against high achievers because they worked so hard for it but we would rather be inclined to those who we think arrived at their destination merely by being naturally talented.

By now, you would have understood that grit is not something built but practiced—it’s a high level of consistent effort and discipline. It’s about acknowledging your weaknesses and finding ways to improve. It’s not to yield to setbacks no matter the temptation but to press on despite unfavourable circumstances and challenges that come your way and to take rejection as merely a stepping stone to extraordinary achievements.

Grit, or talent, there’s no one better than the other, but rather, it intertwines with one another because what it does, is produce skill. To develop a skill is to spend hours upon hours beating your craft to create something refined.

One thing to take note of about skill is this—it isn’t the same thing as an achievement. To further illustrate this, in the absence of talent, your effort is barely anything more than your unmet potential. In the absence of effort, your skills are nothing more than what you could have achieved but didn’t.

The takeaway is this: A skill is produced when talent and effort intertwine, and at the same time, effort makes a skill valuable.

It’s no secret that there are no shortcuts to excellence. After all, Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Grit pivots ‘This is all you can do’ mentality to ‘Who knows what you can do?’

Written by Destiny Goh
Marketing Communications Executive

Photo by David Köhler on Unsplash

How to Embrace Imperfections for Growth: 3 Beneficial Takeaways

gjc on December 21, 2023

by Destiny Goh

  • Imperfections are seen as weakness; many struggles to accept their imperfections and often dismisses them.
  • Thinking in perspective through a growth mindset helps you identify your patterns, behaviours and habits that hinder growth.
  • Throughout the refining process, you’d be able to assess problems objectively, compartmentalise and understand underlying causes and issues.
  • Self-development enhances emotional intelligence in self-management, effective communication, active listening and empathy.
  • This article is inspired by members at Good Job Creations.

Imperfections are often seen as the chink in the armour, an Achilles heel that most people won’t broadcast in the workplace. But imperfections can be powerful when it’s transformed—by embracing them.

But do not confuse your imperfections as your stumbling block, rather, an indicator for improvement. 

You can’t improve what you don’t know. It’s not news that the first step to any improvement, development or solution is to identify the problem, but can we suggest, that is, in fact, the inner conditioning of your mindset.

Truth is, we do see areas in our lives that need work; we have it pointed out to us, get called out for it, and perhaps, it’s written all over the result of our work.

Though it’s true: not everything that needs fixing needs to be fixed, and not every weakness will affect you in any way; working on it takes time and sacrifice.

So, if you allocate all that time to self-development, how can you do it, and what can you potentially learn? 

Here are 3 things you can learn throughout your process of improvement:

  1. Thinking in Perspective 

Psychiatrist-in-chief at Johns Hopkins Hospital, Adolf Meyer says that human thoughts evolve through neurobiological changes—where the brain can reorganise due to experiences. Other complex interplays such as social and cultural influences, education quality, environment and more.  

Working on your weaknesses requires a deeper understanding of yourself, which can be done through self-reflection and acknowledgement. Of course, some might argue we don’t know what we don’t know, but that’s the beauty of getting constructive feedback from others—they see things differently to offer you a new perspective.  

Getting feedback is a tool for growth, but it’s not the determinant of your thoughts; your mindset is. Consider this: your mind creates, it’s not created. Thinking in perspective, through a growth mindset helps you identify patterns, behaviours or habits that may have been hindering any progress.

Keep a lookout for books that offer you a wealth of perspective; podcasts and TED talks offer insights from experts worldwide on diverse subjects; experience different cultures and diverse ways of living by travelling and cultural immersion; online forums such as Reddit and Quora allow you engage with people from different backgrounds.  

Consultant Rebecca shared that a positive attitude stems from a positive mindset. You’d be surprised how development in one area of your life can potentially affect your actions. 

2 . Make problem-solving interesting

This skill is often misunderstood by many; some may think they’re required to solve the problem immediately, that there’s only one correct solution, or that it’s a skill for the ones with the higher IQ.

If you don’t know where to start, we suggest observing how others do it. Don’t just pick anyone to mimic, rather, evaluate the impact of their decisions and actions, ask them about their values and what they believe, learn what inspires them and where they draw knowledge. 

Another method is to incorporate fun to stimulate your brain development. It could be teambuilding activities, a video game or problem-solving platforms on the internet—the options are endless. 

Say you’ve identified your area of weakness, addressing it will involve critical thinking, thorough analysis and evaluation of the overall issue. Such a process enhances your ability to assess problems objectively, compartmentalise them and understand the underlying issues. 

As you tackle them, it encourages you to think outside the box and explore unconventional ways; this, in turn, fosters brain creativity and cognitive fitness that exercises your brain to better reason, generate and experiment. 

3 .  Enhanced Emotional Intelligence

Working on weaknesses often incurs a series of emotions–frustration, disappointment or insecurity–yet this is also a time when you can practice self-management. For context, if your weakness is presenting during big meetings due to anxiety, you can manage that anxiety through breathing exercises and even reframing negative thoughts.

If you are seeking help, advice and counsel from others, you will need to learn how to communicate your needs effectively—be specific with what you desire to achieve; practice active listening to allow yourself to reflect and retain useful information and foster meaningful relationships that spur you toward growth.

Through this, you’d also be able to empathise with other people’s weaknesses and support them in ways you know best, which in return induces continuous learning. 

Rebecca also shared that accepting and acknowledging your worth is important throughout this development journey. Ultimately, it’s important to be kind to yourself; when you see an opportunity for improvement, and if it’s within your power to do so, why not choose growth?  

 

3 Strategies to Embrace Flaws for Personal and Professional Growth

gjc on December 13, 2023

Most of us struggle to accept our flaws. However, embracing them would aid our personal and professional growth.

Meet Rebecca, a Consultant at Good Job Creations specialising in the Construction and Engineering portfolio. In this short interview, Rebecca shares 3 strategies to embrace flaws. They consist of self-awareness, setting realistic goals, and keeping tabs on progress, which helped her identify areas needing improvement that eventually became her greatest strengths.

Take these 3 strategies, implement and embrace our flaws in your life.

Next week, we will be releasing Rebecca’s entire #VoicesOf… podcast, where we discuss how a consultant defines the best fit and the right person for a role, an insight on job hopping, a deep dive into self-development, and the importance of checking in with your mental health.

A Gen Z’s perspective of bridging generational barriers

gjc on November 15, 2023

YouTube | Spotify | Google Podcast

Maybe there are some things we can relearn from the younger generation–rethinking resilience and learning from your experiences through organic growth. 

Transcript of Podcast:

[00:00:00] DESTINY: Hello, my name is Destiny, and this is GJC’s podcast. As Asians, we have unspoken rules, traditions, and beliefs that were passed down through generations. And we never question them because you do what you have to do to survive and provide.

The younger generation, or rather the Gen Zs, are a unique bunch. They’re young, vibrant, vocal, and brave. They do things that we never considered normal long ago. However, there are several social stigmas placed on this particular bunch claiming that they took life way too easily, not resilient, are social media addicts, and are possibly easily offended. They also have high expectations towards their employers, short attention spans, and the list goes on.

But these stereotypes can be broken if you take some time to really understand and get to know them, to try to see things through their point of view, and not force our beliefs down their throat. It’s our job to be role models as the older generation, to explain to them why things are done in a certain way to maintain order.

But also welcome ideas and really listen to understand, put aside judgment, and to give them the opportunity to learn and grow alongside them. We need to educate, contribute, discuss, exchange, empathise and support. It’s time to make room for change.

After all, these are the people of the next generation who will one day lead us.

With me today is Zia Xin, a consultant specialising in recruitment for the Banking and Financial services portfolio, who’s been working at Good Job Creations for well over a year and three months now. She graduated with an accounting degree from Nanyang Technological University, and her desire for a career that would allow her to interact with people from all walks of life has brought her to recruitment.

Though thriving in her role, her journey here was no easy feat. Here’s Zia Xin, who will be sharing her story with you.

ZIA XIN: Hi, everyone; this is Zia Xin. I’m so glad to be on this podcast. It’s my pleasure to be able to share my humble experience in recruitment and what I’ve learned so far with you all.

[00:01:59] DESTINY: Thank you, Zia Xin. So, being one of our youngest individuals working in GJC, what is your perspective on time? And do you think time is on your side, especially when figuring out what you want to do regarding your career?

ZIA XIN: Yes, just to clarify in advance, I am not speaking on behalf of anyone else. Just want to share my perspective as someone who was born in this generation where most of us had access to technologies and widespread information.

Regarding my perspective of time, this is honestly a very difficult question as I know that I’m still working on making friends with time. Personally, there are so many external factors that will affect my view of time, including the urgency of the matter, the importance and value of the matter, the available resources to accomplish the matter, etc. When it comes to planning my career, I have to say, I struggled a lot in managing my relationship with time.

As some of you out there may resonate, I felt lost and wasn’t sure where I was heading towards at one point. Or whether what I was doing daily could push me towards the direction I was looking to go into. So during such moments, I feel rushed and anxious, especially so when there are people around me who shares about their career planning, goals, and all their goals laid out.

So on top of that, time was never really enough for me for the lifestyle I’m looking to maintain. So, I guess I’m looking to balance productive time I spend on work, but also on other hobbies, interests, as well as social life. So from there, I realised I may have to compromise further on certain activities to clear up space for me to eventually work on my future planning.

So, a very straightforward way to manage all these aspects of life is really for me to rank the priority and urgency of all these activities separately, individually. And then thereafter, I’ll break down these bigger goals into smaller objectives and plan during the start of every week. You know, how much I want to accomplish for each of these aspects for this week and then adapt and adjust accordingly.

So, with this way of managing time, I haven’t been feeling overwhelmed, and at the same time, I can acknowledge myself for the little checkpoints I have managed to achieve. So hopefully, this will support us in the long way.

[00:04:22] DESTINY: Thanks for sharing, Zia Xin.

And as you know, the older generation didn’t have the luxury of time back in the day. It was all hustle and long work hours, and today, the new generation seems to have a different way of thinking, as they see the importance of figuring out first before they attach themselves to a long-term commitment.

ZIA XIN: Right.

DESTINY: In this aspect, career. This creates a stigma that the younger generation are indecisive or may even be perceived as living life without any ambition or goals.

So, what are your thoughts about this? And how do we break this stigma of such views on the younger generation?

ZIA XIN: Right, I have heard of these comments circling around too, definitely. And I believe the fact is, priorities across different generations have definitely shifted. I often share these discussions with my parents as well, to understand how life was for them, but also to communicate our ideals.

So a simple and quick illustration of what I mean by difference in priorities could be. For example, back then, the priority for my parents was more to achieve financial stability for their families, be it their family of origin or to build a new family.

It was very simple and straightforward; it didn’t really occur to them to find a job that they were passionate about, that they enjoyed or that they loved, whichever job brings stability and security, right? That’s a great opportunity.

DESTINY: Yeah.

ZIA XIN: Hence, it’s all about the long hours of dedication the line of work that they chose What is more, is that the potential of technology has yet to be discovered then. Many processes are done manually, which is naturally more time-consuming.

DESTINY: That’s right.

ZIA XIN: So, they will spend more time at their work. In contrast, some, if not most of us, in our current generation, can exercise greater freedom and flexibility in decision making. And this isn’t to say our parents lacked options. But rather, we are fortunate to live in an era abundant with resources and information, which definitely drives change. So, there is a change in priorities here, as well as the speed of getting work done.

Many of us in this generation are known to be tech-savvy, so we can make use of tools that are available to us and achieve the intended outcome in a shorter time frame. So, eventually, as we get exposed to further insights of the ever-changing workforce, our career choices will inevitably be influenced.

This is due to the multiple paths available to us that can lead us to reach the same goal. So similarly, when there’s an abundance of choices, I still admire and respect many of us who invest time, money, and effort, in grooming ourselves to be ready for whichever path we take.

[00:06:55] DESTINY: Well, thanks for sharing, Zia Xin.

So, in effort, you know that we, the older generation, can potentially overcome this bias stigma towards the younger generation. So, what are some efforts in your opinion could be done so we’d be able to find common ground, to respect, collaborate and work harmoniously, especially at the workplace?

ZIA XIN: Yes, this is a very great question, which I believe not just you may have it’s a not a question that you only you may have a lot of my peers would also have the same doubts or concern.

DESTINY: I see

ZIA XIN: And I believe they are definitely more than one way to approach this issue. But personally, I have been adopting these two styles. So, one of them is the two way mentorship between me and my direct reporting, which is my team lead, as well as a roundtable discussion within the team.

So, for instance, my team lead and I always provide each other with feedback and share our opinions on most of the work matters, and the purpose of this is to make sure that we comprehend where we’re both coming from. Then only we can come to a common understanding and then brainstorm further for the best approach to deal with a certain case.

In our situation, it would be about candidate management cases, client communication issues, so on and so forth. As for roundtable discussion, this would be the best in terms of how we interact and communicate in a team. So definitely more than two people.

So, we usually bring up our concerns or doubts about cases or issues at work and share with everyone. And as each of us, each of these consultants, has a different way of working, the insights that we will be able to get—together from a simple discussion—definitely far exceed what we can find from the internet alone.

Now this doesn’t mean that we impose our expectations or our way of working on others; it’s more of a platform to widen our perspectives and expand our options to manage a case.

DESTINY: I think it’s a great way that you mentioned your team leader really takes the effort to give your team feedback directly instead of just, you know, not talking about it at all.

And I think also, the ability to discuss with one another, exchanging perspectives, I think that’s a very good approach in working and collaborating together.

ZIA XIN: Yes, definitely.

[00:09:14] DESTINY: So, I think maybe perhaps back then, especially in the Asian culture, emotions, feelings, and mental health were a touchy-feely subject that most would like to avoid because it portrayed a sign of weakness or vulnerability.

But the newer generation has caught on and has realised the problems with ignoring our mental wellness and suppressing our dreams and ambitions and come up with better ideas, and strategies on how we can take care of ourselves better.

[00:09:52] DESTINY: So, Zia Xin, as a young individual like yourself in the workforce, committing wholly to a career doesn’t just happen because you want it to. I mean, I’d say dedicated, yes, because I believe you want to give your best in your role.

So, when will you eventually have it all figured out?

ZIA XIN: Ah, this is a very good question and it’s a tricky question. I do identify myself to be one of those who aspire to find our so-called right path before committing myself to a long-term career journey. So do allow, oh, do allow me to clarify my definition of committing.

I am still committed, like what you say, to doing my best in my current job, no doubt. But I’m still finding meaning in what I do as of now, but also in the future, whether it aligns with what I am interested in. So, I do have a long-term picture, as of now, drawn out of where I will be, but do I have it in clarity?

Frankly speaking, not quite, not quite. But that doesn’t mean that I haven’t been putting in work behind the scenes to eventually map out the career path I’m aiming to build. And there’s no time frame as of now, I have to be honest.

DESTINY: And can you share with us, what are some efforts that you mentioned earlier towards mapping out your desired career path?

ZIA XIN: For this one, it’s quite straightforward. Mainly I’m talking about building transferable and intangible skills, such as how we process feedback and turn them into constructive criticisms, regardless of the circumstances. So, this is actually a way to help us build resilience as well.

On top of that, I was given really great opportunities in my current job to build upon my stakeholder management skills because I do deal with people from different backgrounds, industries and different seniority levels.

And I have to say this really stems from the confidence and support given by my team members; kudos to them. So far, I’ve been elaborating a lot about soft skills because I believe hard skills can be learned and practiced through textbooks, research or reading, or even online materials.

But these intangible skills are definitely better learned through real-life experiences with actual human beings. They can definitely, they will definitely come in handy regardless of whatever career I choose in the future. And oh, this may be my biased opinion. But I don’t see that there is a better way of working, for example, whether we commit to one long-term career right now or we plan out for the future.

Because we achieve different things with the way we operate. Although, I do agree that at some point in time, after a few years into the workforce, it will be beneficial for us, from the perspective of time, that we already get a clearer map and a firm direction. So, to prove as a result of the work we have been putting in since a younger age.

[00:12:53] DESTINY: So, I think the next question has been circling a lot between my peers previously. And the question goes like this.

So, do you think money or family background has a play in being able to afford to take breaks?

Because some people can afford to take a gap year or two from studying or, you know, perhaps before jumping into the work life and then talk about, take some time to discover yourself, your interests, your passion, or travel the world, explore, figure out what you want to do before the long term commitment, or just simply take a break.

So, what do you think, Zia Xin?

ZIA XIN: Okay, this is something that has been going on in our generation as well. Definitely, I have peers who have taken a break during studies. I also have peers who decided to take a break after one or two years of working.

DESTINY: I see.

ZIA XIN: So, personally, I think it’s highly relative to the previous discussion where I mentioned the difference in priorities in life. So, especially, okay, besides the priorities in life, the environment and background, and of course, the financial ability, which you mentioned, will also play a part in shaping our priorities.

So, for example, if I were born into a family with little to no financial freedom, education in itself may already be challenging to complete. So, my priority would be to get into the workforce as soon as possible and generate income to support my family.

So, in this case, it probably doesn’t matter to me too much whether I’m passionate about the field I was working in.

So, similarly, I won’t choose to take breaks that may pause the flow of income. But in contrast, if I grew up in an environment where there is financial stability and freedom, paired with parents who adopts experiential learning since young, this would definitely have constructed an environment where I would naturally be looking for opportunities to venture.

So, my priority here would be to find which path can take me further in life as well as what I want to do in the longer term. In contrast, with traditional strict parenting that believes in committing to a long-term successful career as soon as we graduate. Then regardless of wealth, I would say I’d be influenced one way or another to choose the correct path early in my career.

And then I’ll just stick through it to generate wealth and achieve success.

DESTINY: I think that’s a very interesting perspective coming from a younger generation talking about how finance really, finances really play a role in terms of commitment.

ZIA XIN: It does.

DESTINY: So, in that case, what about students who don’t have enough financial freedom but are looking? You know, to take a breather, what can be done, money aside?

ZIA XIN: Okay. Personally, from what I have observed, this does not speak for everyone. If you’re looking to take a breather from education, and you have a bit of limitation in terms of finances, you wouldn’t want to go on trips, then I would recommend that you can explore part-time jobs or internships which you are interested in, or you are passionate in.

Investing your time in something that you like, I’m pretty sure that is, first of all, fruitful, that will be healthy also. At the same time, you can generate side income. So yeah, that will be a great way. But in the meantime, you can also take this chance to find out whether this is where you like to develop a career in, for the long term. So yeah, win-win situation.

But vice versa. If you’re looking to take a break from a job, so you don’t want to keep working, no studies, then why not try out budget traveling? So do not write this option off completely. You can still travel. We just have to find out a way. So, do your research, figure out a way, improvise, and then adapt. See if there’s a way for you to travel, and have fun, but also within a certain budget.

DESTINY: I like what you talked about. Don’t write off the option traveling off completely because I think here the key skill that you can learn from something like this is to improvise and really, not just make do, but I guess if, if you really wanted something, then go get it, work for it.

[00:17:05] DESTINY: So, when should a student start to think about their careers? What can they do to prepare themselves? What are your thoughts about this, Zia Xin?

ZIA XIN: Okay, honestly Isn’t this just a journey of trial and error until we discover where we want to stay? Because is there really a best time to start thinking about one’s career? Because I know some of us held on to the same aspirations that we had since we were four or five years old.

And some of us only started to think about it during the university period, where we were able to get more clarity on the options that we may have. But some of us only identified a direction after years of working because that’s how they eventually stumble upon what feels right for them after trial and error across a few jobs, employments and industries.

So in my opinion, these all seem to be the right timings. However, there may be some of us who would want to shorten the time spent on discovery.

So, if that is the case, I would suggest that you identify a specific field already, where you’d love to put more time and effort into researching your career options from there.

Instead of giving yourself too many options, too wide of a variety, better do that instead. And then, the downside however, there is a downside to this method. Because you will restrict yourself from potential opportunities outside of that box, so it is up to you, and regardless of your choice, I want to encourage all of us just to trust the process and fine-tune from there on.

DESTINY: So, I think, here’s the thing about interest because I believe that, you know, once you’re committed to something, it all starts from a small interest. And the thing about interest is it needs to be triggered repeatedly through this experience, through your experiences and encounters.

ZIA XIN: Yes, definitely.

DESTINY: And I remember, you know, one of my favourite self-help books called Grit, the book written by this psychologist, Angela Duckworth. She has once said that in her book: Interests are not discovered through introspection. Instead, they are triggered by interactions you make with the outside world.

And without experience and without experimenting, you can’t figure out, you know, what, which interest will stick, and which won’t. By incorporating fun and creating learning experiences for yourself, figure out what you like to do and stick with it, you know, and be good at it through deliberate practice.

ZIA XIN: Yeah.

DESTINY: Don’t worry if it changes over time. It happens, you know; it’s only you’re no longer interested in what you were initially doing. It’s normal. And yeah, and it’s okay, I think. But while you’re doing it, while you’re at it, give your best efforts and learn all that you can.

[00:19:41] DESTINY: So, next question, this question will be directed towards your career. So, was recruitment your first choice when choosing your career? Why did you stay?

ZIA XIN: Okay. Yeah, this is very interesting. As Destiny has previously shared, you know, regarding my background, I came from Accounting. So initially, I opted for an Accounting degree, thinking that it will bring me stability in the future because that is what I have been told, you know, it’s a stable career.

But after I went through the first year of Uni, I knew I was not developing a long-term career in the accounting field. Unfortunately, neither did I excel in Accounts as compared to my peers, nor was I really passionate in finance then.

So, I was venturing my options. I thought I’d like to develop further in a career where I get to interact with people as part of my job, which then redirected my anchor to looking at career opportunities within the HR sector.

And that’s how I started to explore the recruitment options. So fast forward to my interview with GJC for the recruitment consultant role. Elaine, which is my manager, has played a big part in helping me understand what recruitment is like. She was very devoted and made me feel so comfortable during her sharing.

Truth be told, I did have reservations about the idea of sales, but it was really a great opportunity for me to develop organic growth as I spoke to people from all walks of life at different seniority. So, I stayed on because of the intangible learning and the stakeholder management skills, which I mentioned earlier, especially for a junior like me.

Cause I’m pretty sure I don’t get these kinds of opportunities every day. So, on top of that is that the industrial insight I get from my candidates, from my clients, my team leaders, people, and my seniors around me, those are all precious information that I can keep and use in the future.

[00:21:31] DESTINY: I like how you talked about organic growth and just really learning anything, something new from scratch, instead of going someplace where you think that you deserve it just because of your perhaps whatever stated on your paper. So, I think that’s a very good, you know, perspective from you.

And from what you were telling me earlier, you graduated with a degree in Accounting. But the finance and the banking and finance portfolio is very niche and requires you to speak with mostly candidates who have plenty of years of experience in the field. So how do you navigate through these situations?

Because I know, for one, it is so difficult. What were some of the challenges that you faced?

ZIA XIN: So, this is a very good question, and it is very relevant to what’s going on with me right now. It could be intimidating, as you shared. Because for our Banking and Finance portfolio, just to give you a bit of background, we basically deal with candidates and clients coming from, who are specialising in banks or non-banking financial institutions.

So I liaise and interact with front, middle and back-office professionals of different seniority. As you mentioned, one of the significant challenges that I was facing at the start of my career was the understanding of technical terms and contextual knowledge that is really required when we speak to all these candidates.

Understandably, candidates enjoy communicating with recruiters that know what they are looking for and what is needed to support them in securing the opportunity. So, I always felt like I lacked such expertise which resulted in experiencing imposter syndrome at times. But regardless, I try my best to gather enough intel around to make sure I am adding on values for my candidates.

[00:23:29] DESTINY: And if I’m not wrong, this year, you’re only 23. And already you’re in such a niche portfolio, learning everything from scratch. I really do respect what you do. And in regard to, previously, you mentioned that you did experience something called the imposter syndrome.

Could you perhaps elaborate further on, you know, this particular syndrome and how did you overcome it?

ZIA XIN: Oh, yes, I definitely would love to share. This syndrome usually kicks in when I’m assigned to new job openings and roles by our clients to fulfil when I have a limited understanding of the job. This means that I have no full context of how this role or what this job entails.

So, usually, in such situations, I’ll approach it with the following three steps. First, research about the client. So, what do I know about this client? What is their business about? How are they viewed by the candidates in the market?

And then moving on, researching about the role itself—about this job. What are the key requirements that we see across the industry? And then with that, I can get a deeper understanding of how it is, it could be, like working in this job.

And then the last point is to target the right candidates. So, for this one, I am really grateful to my team leader and manager because they have been guiding me so closely since day one.

My team lead, who has an extensive background in Banking, always manages to draw a clear picture of all these roles and about all these job openings. Although I may not have a Banking and Financial background, I can’t say that having studied Accounting did not help out with picking up certain knowledge of this role.

DESTINY: Yeah, because I do understand that in the Banking and Finance sector, there are many, many roles, and quite a number of them are niche roles, and to take the time to really understand what a particular role is required of a candidate takes a lot of, I would say, a lot of studying in the background.

So, I think, in other words, taking initiative on your end and making an effort greatly helps instead of solely relying on other people to teach us. So, at the same time, having a relationship with helpful and experienced people is a plus point too. And I think you would also ask questions that make them think as well.

So it’s not just like a take-and-take relationship between you and your team leader. But also, you add value to your team. I think even when you don’t even realise it.

ZIA XIN: Yup, very essential.

[00:25:59] DESTINY: So, Zia Xin, you’re one of the youngest members of your team, of more experienced and qualified adults. Can you give the audience a glimpse of what communication and working together between you and your team look like?

ZIA XIN: Oh, definitely. So, in our team, we value close communication, strong teamwork, and transparency a lot. So as a junior, as the junior of the team, I have been absorbing so much new knowledge and gaining exposure from each of my senior team members. I’m really grateful that they have always been so patient and understanding to my queries.

Similarly, we share a lot regarding any client or candidate issues, which I mentioned earlier, for case studies. It’s actually a way, a form of learning for us. And this helps so much in identifying better ways to navigate and improving our quality as consultants.

So on a side note, I have received tremendous support and constructive feedback from them. And that, once again, pushes my learning further.

[00:25:59] DESTINY: I think when you mentioned the idea about discussing case studies, this is something that doesn’t really happen often, I feel in terms of collaboration within a team and studying what went wrong and what could be improved in the next round.

I think this is something that even I potentially will want to consider to adopt this, because I’m also working in a team, and I think this would be very useful for me as well.

So, what would you advise your juniors who may be working with and struggling to communicate with older colleagues?

ZIA XIN: Oh, okay. In short, I have to say this in the most cliche way. So, with an open heart and open mindset, and showing respect for others with these three foundations, we can pretty much work with anyone.

Because we’d be putting ourselves in each other’s shoes, trying to comprehend the direction of where they were coming from, and then brainstorm a solution and eventually come to a common agreement.

Though it’s not every time we manage to come to a uniform conclusion, ultimately, I believe showing respect for one another’s differences is essential. Consequently, I believe this trains our adaptability in the workforce, which is also considered one of the most valued soft skills, especially in our current era of globalisation.

DESTINY: I like how you mentioned showing respect for others because I think as a young person, you know, speaking in the midst of so many people who are much more experienced and way older, I think that sometimes it’s a good reminder for myself as well to, I guess, not to be the smart aleck and assume. Something you think you know everything, but in reality, there’s so many things that we still haven’t considered.

And I think that going in a project or any collaboration with an open mind is so important because I think not to have these preconceived thoughts about certain people or the way things are done.

But I think going in with a totally neutral mind and the idea of honouring others, you know, for their skill set, for the experience and doing our best to work together. It’s such an important value, especially working in a corporate culture.

ZIA XIN: I agree.

[00:29:20] DESTINY: Thank you so much, Zia Xin, for taking the time out of your busy schedule to be on this podcast. And I believe our audience, especially the younger ones, would have greatly benefited from your insights, advice and experience.

You’re listening to good job creations till then. See you again next month.

Podcast written and edited by Destiny Goh

Marketing Communications Executive

#Voicesof…Keika-san: Adaptability in the unknown

gjc on October 27, 2023

Catch a sneak peek here:

or stream the full episode on:

YouTube | Spotify | Google Podcast

Japanese-born Keika Aoki, shares about moving and adapting in the unknown environment outside of her homeland.

Japanese version of the podcast transcript

Transcript of Podcast:

[00:00:00] Destiny: You’re listening to GJC’s podcast. I’m your host, Destiny Goh.

Getting out of your comfort zone can be both daunting and exciting. It’s the adrenaline rush and the fear of uncertainty of not knowing what awaits you.

Some might come up with a conclusion to say the grass isn’t always greener on the other side, but despite that conclusion drawn, I think it’s what you’ve experienced, learned, and built through it all that makes it count.

[00:00:26] Destiny: I enjoy listening to the stories of people who’ve been to other corners of the world, whether it’s for education, the start of a new life, or even career.

I believe they have amazing stories to share, especially ones that have to do with adaptability— how they adapt into a new place so well, how they make new friends, how they fit in at their new workplaces, and how they overcome challenges and valuable life lessons that they carry with them.

[00:00:51] Destiny: Joining me on this podcast today is my guest, Keika Aoki. Keika has previously lived in the US, UK and Sweden.

Then after completing her tertiary education in Japan, she decided to move to Singapore to start a career in recruitment.

And it’s been three and a half years since she’s joined GJC and she’s here to share about her experience navigating through Singapore as a foreigner, how she adapted into a new country and career, the challenges and obstacles in and out of work, as well as some valuable life lessons she’s picked up throughout her life living abroad.

[00:01:24] Destiny: Hi, Keika. Thank you for joining me today on this podcast. How are you feeling today?

[00:01:28] Keika: Hi, Destiny. Yeah, I’m feeling great. Thank you.

[00:01:31] Destiny: Can you share with me more about your life back when you were living in the U. S., U.K., and Sweden? How would you describe your life there?

[00:01:41] Keika: Okay, so maybe just for context, before moving to Japan for high school, I grew up overseas, specifically US, UK, Sweden for close to 13 years, and the reason why I was there is due to my dad’s work.

[00:01:58] Keika: He was doing corporate strategy for a Japanese electronics company back then. So, my family and I would follow him wherever he was stationed.

And yeah, I’d say, as hectic as it was having to move maybe every two, three years growing up, it was definitely exciting. And yeah, it was never boring because obviously we were moving around different countries, being exposed to different cultures. It definitely taught me a lot of things growing up.

[00:02:37] Destiny: And out of these three countries, which one was your, by far, your favourite?

[00:02:42] Keika: I’d say UK. I lived in London for five years. Yeah, I have a lot of good memories from when I was there.

[00:02:53] Destiny: Was there anything that you miss most about those countries?

[00:02:57] Keika: Definitely. I miss the aesthetics of London. Everything is really beautiful there. The buildings, the way everything is structured.

And, because personally, I enjoy western food.  I do miss the food as much as everyone says that, you know, UK food is not good, I actually enjoyed it.

[00:03:21] Destiny: So, what was your favourite dish back then?

[00:03:23] Keika: See, there’s no dish. I just enjoy western food in general. So, when I moved back to Japan, because everything is mostly Japanese food. Um, it did take some time to get used to it.

[00:03:37] Destiny: And do you experience a culture shock back when you moved to Japan after living abroad for so many years?

So, moving back to your home country, was it exciting? Was it frightening? How was it like for you?

[00:03:50] Keika: Yeah, definitely. When I first, when my parents first told me that we were moving back to Japan, I cried, like I bawled my eyes out because of how much I didn’t want to move back to Japan.

Just because, growing up overseas as a Japanese, but having no experience living in Japan, it was like I was Japanese, but there was nothing in really Japanese about me that I personally resonated with.

[00:04:24] Keika: So, it was definitely frightening to have to move back or, you know, like move to a new place that was supposed to be my home.

And definitely when I moved to Japan, everything was a culture shock.

Like the way people behave, the values, even the lifestyle was very different. It was the first Asian country that I lived in. So, yeah, it was different.

Because I would go to Japan for summer or winter holiday, maybe every two years, but it was very different having to travel there and to live there. So, yeah, everything was different.

[00:05:07] Destiny: How was life like back in Japan for you? How long did it take you to settle down?

[00:05:16] Keika: Definitely the first, maybe two, three years, I’d say I was quite unstable. Maybe because I was a teenager or because I was still getting used to the environment.

But now that I think about it… not that I was lashing out at my parents but just looking back to like the way I was feeling back then and my behaviours, I think I was under a lot of stress.

[00:05:49] Destiny: How do you finally manage to overcome this stressful period and eventually fitting in and then meeting new friends

[00:06:02] Keika: Um, luckily, making friends was never something that I struggled with. I had friends, but really feeling comfortable in Japan took maybe three years for me. And the way I did it was, I think just be humble, like accept that I was in a different place.

And that everything that I knew until that point was going to be different naturally in a different country.

[00:06:33] Keika: And also, to try to see the good in each culture. So, I think in the first maybe two, three, I kept thinking, I kept looking at the bad part of Japan, like, you know, the cultural, there were just some things that I just couldn’t get used to in Japan that I didn’t have to experience back when I was overseas, so…

Yeah, I just kept looking at the bad things, but once I started to notice the good things about Japanese culture, Japanese history, it really helped me to really love the country.

[00:07:14] Destiny: Why do you choose a career in recruitment?

[00:07:16] Keika: Okay, so I chose recruitment as my career right out of university because I wanted to start somewhere that will allow me to have a real general understanding of the corporate world.

And in that sense, recruitment, in my opinion, was the best choice because it allowed me to be exposed to various industries as well as really allow me to have an understanding of how corporate organisations are structured.

[00:07:46] Destiny: And how do you find meaning in your job?

[00:07:48] Keika: Okay, so in my first couple of years, my role was very meaningful to me because it really allowed me to be in connection with so many different people, whether it be the HR of an organisation, top management to C-suite level people.

So, it really gave me opportunity to meet with many new people. And currently, for now, I’m leading a team of four members in the business development team.

So now I find meaning in my job by guiding junior members and yeah, just listening to their struggles, thinking of how to overcome those struggles together.

[00:08:36] Destiny: Mm-hmm. Could you share with us what are some cultural differences you found to be different between Singapore and your home country, Japan?

[00:08:44] Keika: I’d say that my experience relocating to Singapore was much smoother than what other people would typically experience, just because I already had experience living overseas from a young age.

I’d say I’m relatively accustomed to adapting to different communities, but still having experience living in the, say, U.S., U.K., and Sweden was very different from living in Singapore, which was the first Southeast Asian country that I lived in.

And I’d say the main cultural difference between Singapore and Japan is just how friendly and open people in general are.

[00:09:26] Keika: So not saying that people in Japan are not friendly, but usually strangers are just, I mean, like polite or cordial to each other, but in Singapore, I noticed that regardless of whether you personally know each other or not, people are generally warmer and more accepting.

So, one example of this would be just when I, when I just joined this company, my colleagues would invite me over to their houses for holidays and special occasions, which doesn’t usually happen in Japan unless you’re really close to the person.

[00:10:06] Destiny: Well, that’s really, really nice of them. And what are the initial challenges after your relocation to Singapore? And how do you tackle them?

[00:10:14] Keika: Right, so the biggest challenge I faced right after I moved was definitely the COVID situation because I was in Singapore by myself with no relatives, no friends, just starting my career.

And yeah, with COVID, I couldn’t go out, I couldn’t make new friends, no community to help me. So yeah, the first couple of years was definitely lonely. But right after when COVID started to settle, I started to make some new friends.

And the way I did that, I say, is just to take it slow and to make it known that you’re looking for connections.

[00:10:54] Keika: So, what I mean here is you will meet one friend, and then just who will then introduce you to maybe one of their other friends that you just venture out from there.

So, you don’t need to think about it in a way that you need to make many, many new friends in one setting. Just yeah, just get to know each person one by one.

And if you make it known that, oh, I’m actually looking to make new friends, you know, people are generally quite nice here, so they will definitely help you.

[00:11:25] Destiny: And what about the people who are much shyer, uh, who are, you know, maybe they are not really vocal in expressing their needs to make new friends. So, what’s your advice for people who are typically on, you know, the quieter end?

[00:11:43] Keika: I’d say to take it slow because definitely, I myself am not a very extroverted person. I’m the type of person who will have maybe one, two, or three very close friends. And, you know, I won’t have like hundreds of friends

So, what I did also was just to maybe find one or two friends that really resonates with you and build your relationship there and not to rush into making more connection.

[00:12:22] Destiny: I think your idea here is to be very intentional with the kind of people that you mix around with and also, your advice to people who are slightly shyer is to make the first step to make an effort, probably with a little encouragement from others.

And I think it’s also important that to know what they intend to get out of these friendships because I think for people who are slightly shyer, they’re not really vocal with what they want.

[00:12:55] Destiny: But I think perhaps with a little encouragement from the people around them, you know, and also if when they see the blossoming of a fruitful friendship and what it may look like, I think that would greatly affect their decisions to do so as well.

And so, what are the kinds of support you received while working and living in Singapore from, say, your family?

 

[00:13:23] Keika: My family, I’d say we would have video calls every couple of months. So, we would just catch up on how each of us are doing.

And because I was just starting off my career back when I came here, I would share some of the struggles I was facing and get some advice from my parents.

[00:13:45] Destiny: Are your parents currently working now?

[00:13:46] Keika: Yes, my dad’s still working, so he will, yeah, give me advice as a senior in the workplace.

[00:13:56] Destiny: So, he’s back in Japan as well?

[00:13:58] Keika: Yes.

[00:13:58] Destiny: And what about your workplace at GJC? What kind of support have you received from your colleagues or even your managers, and your bosses?

[00:14:07] Keika: So, when I joined there were actually two other fresh grads that came with me, so it definitely helped that there were other people at the same level as I was who were going through similar things.

So, we would, yeah, just catch up on a regular basis, share how we were doing and our struggles, and yeah, just give each other advice.

[00:14:32] Destiny: And what about a local community in Singapore where, where it consists mostly of your friends and your social circle?

[00:14:40] Keika: I’d say this part was something that I struggled with in the first maybe one, two years moving to Singapore because I did struggle making new friends when I just came here.

But recently, now that the borders open and I’ve made many new friends compared to back then, my friends will definitely support me in a way that I can just detach myself from work whenever I’m with people who are outside of work.

So, we will just have fun over the weekend, and it’ll give me a nice, like, refresh session.

[00:15:17] Destiny: Could you share with me, like, what do you do with your friends over the weekend? What kind of activities that you guys, you know?

[00:15:26] Keika: Oh, I mean, it depends, but I do like to go out for, like, cafe hopping with my friends, go to nice restaurants. There are a lot of good food places in Singapore, so we will, like, try to go to those locations.

[00:15:43] Destiny: So how do you maintain a connection with your Japanese culture and roots despite being in a foreign country?

[00:15:50] Keika: I’d say that there are some parts of me that is typically set to be Japanese, so for example, typically people say that Japanese are quite modest and they’re polite, and I feel like those are qualities that I have, and I do take pride in that.

So, yeah, it’s something that I try to keep with me. But, of course, if there are other… say, like, different cultures that I resonate with, I will also incorporate that in my life.

[00:16:24] Destiny: And I also realised that before you and our other Japanese colleagues, before they leave the office to have a client visit, there’s a term that you would let everybody know that you’re going out?

[00:16:37] Keika: Oh, itte kimasu.

[00:16:38] Destiny: Yeah. And I feel that that’s really nice to let your colleagues know, like where you’re going and stuff.

So, I feel that that’s you basically still retaining that side of you that’s really Japanese and really courteous and polite.

[00:16:57] Destiny: And can you share with me your experience as a foreigner navigating through the workplace in Singapore? And what are some memorable experiences you’ve had being here?

[00:17:08] Keika: I say one main reason why I enjoy going to different places is because it allows me to travel to locations that I will usually not go.

And in Singapore, I feel like each location has its own unique vibe and atmosphere, which is something that I still to this day enjoy experiencing.

[00:17:31] Destiny: And you know, I think most people, at least from what I heard, you mentioned that Singapore there’s not much to explore, perhaps maybe for locals, but for foreigners like ourselves, do you think the same way?

[00:17:48] Keika: Um, well, definitely it is a small country. So, after maybe a few years, you kind of just get used to all the locations out there, but I am still interested in the difference between Japan and Singapore.

And I’m still amazed at how different, but similar some parts of some cultures are.

[00:18:14] Destiny: And, you know, aside from cafes, maybe there could be one or two places, a place that you would recommend to your friends who are visiting from Japan. Are there places as such?

[00:18:25] Destiny: For me, for example, I love Universal Studios. I know that it’s not the biggest place, but I just find it to be a really exciting getaway.

And because I just, you know, whenever I head over there, I just feel like I kind of forget the stress that’s behind me. And I thoroughly enjoy myself over the really thrilling, exciting rides. And I feel like I just can’t get enough of it.

[00:18:52] Keika: Okay, and in that sense, I always recommend East Coast Park to my friends coming to Singapore because I’m from Tokyo, a lot of my friends are also from Tokyo, which is the city area.

So East Coast Park is just a nice place, like, a place that you can see the ocean, and there’s the greens, and there’s also the hawker centres, which we don’t have in Japan, so it’s a different experience.

[00:19:24] Destiny: There is no hawker centres at all in Japan?

[00:19:25] Keika: No.

[00:19:27] Destiny: And, oh okay, that’s interesting. I didn’t know that.

[00:19:31] Destiny: Okay, so were there life lessons that you’ve learned while working here at GJC that have helped you become a better individual?

[00:19:40] Keika: Um, working in a multicultural environment has definitely taught me to be more open minded and patient with others. Because I say communication in general is a very complex thing, even within the same community.

So, interacting with colleagues and even clients of different backgrounds and nationalities is an even bigger challenge. And even more, for some people, English is their second or even third language, so there’s the language barrier as well.

So, now that I’ve worked here for over three years, it’s, I feel like now I always try to understand the deeper context of what people are trying to tell me, even if it’s not stated clearly in their speech or message.

[00:20:30] Destiny: How do you make out the, the context of what people are saying? I know that, you know, communication is a skill, and it’s easily thrown around by everybody.

But I feel that sometimes all talk and no listen isn’t exactly communication. But maybe for you, it might be different. So, what efforts do you take to initiate to understand people on a on a deeper level?

[00:20:58] Keika: Like whenever I’m communicating with people I always try to think like, oh what is this person trying to tell me, what are their intentions behind their messages? Like I really try to read into the deeper meaning, and sometimes there’s no deep meaning- deeper meaning.

So, I don’t maybe necessarily need to do it all the time, but I’d say definitely it’s helped me to avoid miscommunication on various occasions.

[00:21:30] Destiny: Great. So, do you have any advice? You know, for fellow women who are thinking about or have plans to relocate to Singapore?

[00:21:39] Keika: Yeah. So as a woman living alone in a foreign country, it can definitely seem intimidating, especially if it’s far from your home country. But I can definitely say that Singapore would be one of the best options out there, just because how safe and convenient everything is here.

It is a small country, like for one, you don’t have to worry about traveling for hours just to get somewhere, and also the taxi here is very convenient.

So even if you’re out for dinner or you’re out late, you don’t have to worry about getting home safely, which is one of the most important things living by yourself in a foreign country.

[00:22:27] Destiny: Yeah. I feel like I can totally vouch for this because this is something that I think, especially women, we ourselves will never take this for granted. And I think Singapore is yes, indeed, definitely one of the safest places that I have personally been.

I don’t have to worry if my laptop will be stolen if I leave it on the table for too long. I guess people are generally more honest in being here.

I think I do appreciate the law and especially, you know, when, when laws are stricter, I feel that it also gives people a sense of security, I feel like to really keep the country together.

[00:23:12] Destiny: So, maybe you can share, you know, how do you build this skill of adaptability? Because hearing from what you’ve been telling me that you’ve lived in, I would say, various countries, how do you adapt from one country to another?

How do you fit in into the society and everything else?

[00:23:33] Keika: So, one is to be open minded. You need to understand that you are the one that is in a foreign environment. So just keep an open mind that most likely everything you know will be different.

And another thing will be to take interest in the local community, whether it be their culture, their background, their history. Understanding why some things are the way it is will definitely help you understand the way the modern, you know, the society that you are in at that time is the way it is.

[00:24:11] Destiny: So, I feel that I’ve learned greatly from you today on this podcast, Keika. Thank you so much for joining me.

[00:24:19] Keika: Thank you so much.

[00:24:22] Destiny: Uh, yeah, for joining me and, and, you know, telling me your stories, like what you’ve been doing in the past and how you have blossomed from, you know, from a fresh graduate into a full-blown working adult.

[00:24:32] Destiny: And it’s been three and a half years since you’ve been in Singapore. I hope you have been enjoying your time here.

[00:24:37] Keika: Yeah, definitely!

[00:24:39] Destiny: And I just wish you all the very best in everything that you do. To our audience, I hope that there will be huge takeaways for you through this podcast with Keika. Thank you so much, Keika!

[00:24:52] Keika: Thank you so much!

 

Podcast written and edited by Destiny Goh
Marketing Communications Executive

Emotional Intelligence: it starts from within

gjc on September 14, 2023

Most would say emotional intelligence is being in tune with their emotions—recognising their strengths and weaknesses, what makes them tick—or think it’s simply being ‘nice’ to others.

Though not entirely wrong, what’s missing is the relationships with others and their social environment.  In any working institution, emotional intelligence is the foundation of all relationships, and it ripples into our emotional expression and interactions with others.

See the four aspects of your Emotional Intelligence you can improve on.

What is Emotional Intelligence, and why is there a need for it?

Psychologist and best-selling author Daniel Goleman says it’s the ability to recognise and manage our emotions with the capacity to understand and influence the feelings of others.

It stimulates compassion for others, effectively communicating with different types of people in various situations and being both self and socially aware of your response towards others.

Four attributes that make up Emotional Intelligence:

An excerpt taken from Emotional Intelligence by author, Daniel Goleman

How can I improve my Emotional Intelligence ?

1. Self-awareness:

Rash decisions are made if we allow emotions to influence our judgement, whether stressed or even when we feel good. Yes, even feeling elated won’t keep you from making a wrong decision. A relatable scenario would be the exorbitant spending in the guise of ‘treating yourself’, but regret follows when the bills come in later for that fleeting ‘feel good’ moment.

Consultant Gabriel Tan shared that we’re all emotional beings, and all kinds of emotions easily sway us. Taking hold of your emotions will not make you a more controlled person but a wise decision-maker.

Pro tip: make an effort to be emotionally present by taking a step back to consider the consequences of your actions and how they will impact you and those around you.

Pause to pinpoint your thoughts and emotions, ask for help if needed, and take heart that it isn’t a sign of weakness but rather your commitment and action taken to improve.

2. Self-management:

Self-management is what we do with the information gathered from being self-aware, and there are several key areas to build it on, such as:

  • Authenticity
  • Adaptability
  • Optimism

Be authentic about your emotions and stay true to your values—though it doesn’t mean sharing anything and everything—but being consciously transparent about your beliefs, priorities and boundaries in your decision-making allows people to see your motives or intentions in plain sight.

Adaptability means working without boundaries and finding diverse and accidental solutions to tackle challenges. Observe, learn, or ask for guidance from those who exhibit this quality; reset and reframe your focus to objectively view things or practice self-talk like, ‘Just because I’m in a bad mood doesn’t mean I’ll have a bad day.’

Optimism doesn’t mean closing a blind eye toward negativity, but reframing your mindset to filter out the good that comes from the situation—could be a valuable lesson or experience.  Putting your thoughts into perspective helps form realistic interpretations that give you a positive outlook toward situations and people.

3. Social awareness:

Ever been told to ‘read the room?’

As we get better at managing our feelings and emotions, we’ll need to know how to read the emotions of others, as this will significantly increase the effectiveness of our interpersonal relationships.

The simplest example of being socially aware is to pay attention to a person’s body language then plan our responses accordingly. Be slow to make assumptions and listen to understand.

Gabriel gathered from his experience that like-minded people often create a healthy social environment, and companies with a great working culture don’t happen overnight. To make that happen, it’s important to be socially aware of our surroundings; making small initiatives through understanding, observing and respecting one another’s differences is a great start.

4. Relationship management:

In any healthy relationship, what we want to get out of it is self-development and the opportunity to develop others. Developing others is an emotionally intelligent skill we can cultivate through asking and giving constructive feedback—this allows us to exchange and learn from others’ ideas, strengths, and knowledge.

Offering your expertise creates opportunities to collaborate with people who fill the gaps they seek to bridge.

Next, create better conversations.

Radio journalist and public speaker Celeste Headlee, shares in a podcast that talking and conversing are two different things. The goal isn’t constantly proving you’re better than everyone else but getting people to be good talkers.

If you desire better conversations, learn to ask questions that spark your curiosity and refrain from equating your experience with whom you’re speaking to because there’s a chance you’d turn the focus back to yourself, morphing into conversational narcissism.

Cultivating emotional intelligence encourages you to constantly reflect, manage, and process your emotions. Then, include others and make them feel important as you embark on your journey to success.

 

Written by Destiny Goh
Marketing Communications Executive

Illustrations made with Canva

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